The 3 Talks: Talking With Kids
Using the Body Safety Songs to Help Kids “Recognize, Resist and Report”
Recognize:
Know Which Parts Are Private Parts:
Songs: The Swimsuit Song, The Bath Time Conversation Song (aka: Mom, Dad, the Dr & Me)
~It is important to teach kids the correct names of their private parts. This will empower them to be able to communicate accurately if something has happened, and it removes the taboo nature of those parts. They aren’t bad or gross, they are not bad words, but if kids are not allowed to say those words around you, they will not feel comfortable telling you about a situation involving those parts. If your kids thought you were uncomfortable with the word “knee” or thought it was a bad word, they would not feel comfortable talking to you about their knees. Private parts include the genitals, bum, breasts, nipples and mouth, and we keep them to ourselves.
Know What Kinds of Touches are Safe and Unsafe
Song: The Swimsuit Song
~Touching, showing or sharing any place covered by a swimsuit is not safe for children. This includes taking pictures of those parts. Other people are supposed to keep private parts to themselves and not share them with kids.
Attributes of a Safe Adult:
Songs: My Safety Circle
~ Safe People: *Don’t keep secrets, *Avoid being all alone with kids, *Keep private parts private, *Listen to when kids say “No” to unwanted touch, *Ask other adults, not children, when they need help, especially with their bodies, *Protect kids from pornography, alcohol, drugs, etc., and *They are best friends with other adults, not with children.
Attributes of an Unsafe Adult:
Song: Tricky People
~Unsafe (Tricky) People pretend to be something they are not. “The only way to tell who’s who is to watch for things they say and do.” They *Tell children to hide things from their parents, *Try to be all alone with kids, *Show, share, touch , or take pictures of private parts, *Don’t listen when kids say “No” to unwanted touch, *Share pornography, or alcohol/drugs with kids, even “on accident,” *Ask kids for help with their problems, *Say that the child is their “best friend” and/or has the child use their first name.
Know What Unsafe Pictures are (Pornography):
Song: I Know What To Do
~”Pictures that show people, that don’t have all their clothing, The parts a swimsuit covers are not covered they are showing.” Unsafe pictures show people’s private parts. They can also be any kind of picture that makes a child feel afraid, or uncomfortable.
Know Their Body’s Warning Signs
Songs: The Uh-Oh Feeing, I’ve Gotta Go
Resist
Understand Bodily Autonomy & Consent:
Songs: My Body, My Rules!
Plan Exit Strategies:
Song: I’ve Gotta Go
Practice Phrases for Saying No:
Song: The Swimsuit Song
Report
Know the Difference Between Secrets & Surprises:
Song: Tell! Tell! Tell!
Practice Phrases for Telling:
Song: The Swimsuit Song, I Know What To Do
Know Who They Can Tell:
Song: My Safety Circle, Tricky People